Jesus had chosen twelve men. Twelve people were hand-picked to be His closest friends, to become His followers and to keep His teachings alive and pass them down to others. But one of them betrays Him, decides to turn his Master in for 30 pieces of silver. Judas was this man who ruined it all, in human eyes. Then he tragically dies. There are eleven men left. In the meantime, all of humanity is saved by Jesus Christ’s Death and Resurrection. Then begins the Easter story where Jesus appears to some of His followers; some believe, some don’t. Eventually He appears to them all and after 40 days He ascends to His Father but leaves the promise of the coming of His Holy Spirit, the Advocate.

It was right in between these events, the Ascension and the coming of His Holy Spirit, or Pentecost, that St. Peter, the head of this small community at the time, decided to fill the empty place at the table. “Therefore, it is necessary that one of the men who accompanied us the whole time the Lord Jesus came and went among us, beginning from the baptism of John until the day on which He was taken up from us, become with us a witness to His resurrection.” (Acts 1:21-22)

The election of this new apostle came down to two candidates: “Joseph called Barsabbas, who was also known as Justus, and Matthias.” (Acts 1:23) Isn’t it ironic that the author of the Acts of the Apostles elaborates so much about the first candidate and his name, and only mentions Matthias? It makes one think that Joseph could have been the one everyone thought was a better fit. Thankfully, they didn’t rely on their own opinions. They left it up to God. They prayed and “they gave lots to them, and the lot fell upon Matthias” (Acts 1:26) One could almost imagine a sigh going across the room if it wasn’t who they expected. “And he was counted with the eleven apostles.” (Acts 1:26)

And so there ends any biblical mentions of St. Matthias. But this was just the beginning for him. He was now a part of the Apostles, the first witnesses of Jesus’ Death and Resurrection. But it’s not like he was born a saint and had no normal human feelings or thoughts. Of course, it is not known what he thought or said, or what he went through. But putting oneself in his shoes may make one think it wasn’t that easy with just the fact to be named Judas’ successor. Knowing that he has been blessed with the gift of being named an apostle, but not being hand-picked physically by Christ like all the rest of them may have been a challenge for his heart to overcome. Doubts of being good enough, or thoughts like, “If God wanted me to be an apostle, why didn’t Jesus just pick me in the first place instead of that Judas?” could have been coming across his mind, no one knows for sure. If he did have such sabotaging thoughts, then he must have put them to rest in God and ultimately trusted in God’s Plan and in His Mercy.

May St. Matthias intercede for us to become true followers of Christ, even if we do have our faults, depressing thoughts, or anything else. May the Lord cleanse our hearts and minds so that we may one day attain sainthood, just like St. Matthias. Amen!

Marta Sniezko

It is even more important in these difficult moments to give thanks to God. He wants me to still come to Him and examine those tough situations, look for good in them, and thank Him for it all. Not always, though, do I find a good thing in a hard situation right away. Then I must thank the Lord for the situation in general, trusting that He will bring some sort of good out of it and that there is a reason why He is allowing it, even though we might not understand why at the moment. This thanksgiving even in tough situations helps us practice our trust and humility in God.

Look at Joseph from the Old Testament. The one with the colored cloak. The one with the “wicked” brothers who bullied him, threw him into a deep hole in the ground, wanted to kill him, and eventually sold him as a slave. And that was not the end of his “hard times”. Forced into Egyptian slavery, he had to work hard and even then was falsely accused of several things and had to “rot” in jail for this. His life was anything but a blessing at this point one could say. And yet, God had a purpose for it. And it wasn’t obvious until decades later when Joseph worked his way up to the pharaoh’s right hand man. God allowed all of those horrible things to happen in order to use Joseph for a bigger purpose in the future and help feed people in the time of a great famine, and save his starving family, too. If he had the most loving brothers earlier on, who catered to him at every beg and plea, he would have never ended up in Egypt. If he wasn’t accused of the wrongdoings as a slave and spent several years in prison, he would have never met the Pharaoh and became his best advisor. God has His Ways. And as He says in Isaiah, “For my thoughts are not your thoughts, nor are your ways my ways, says the Lord.” (Isaiah 55:8)

So as the Word of God shows, God knows best. But do I trust Him? Do I still thank him humbly for everything that happens to me that is out of my control? Because guess who is in control? He is! And I may not see why for a long time, or even ever in my lifetime. But there is a greater purpose.

Lord, please help me be a Joseph of my time. Let me trust you and be thankful for everything you are putting in my way, whether I understand it or not. Lord, I do believe in you, help my unbelief, and help me trust more fully in Your Mercy and Divine Providence. Amen.

Marta Sniezko